Gifts in funny wrapping paper

My eyes drive me crazy sometimes. Watering uncontrollably. It can look like I’m crying when really I’m not. And it all started about four years ago. When I was first diagnosed. And while there are times when they are better than others, they really haven’t stopped watering since. It seems something opened the floodgates.

I’ve had them checked. Dutifully arriving at the optometrist to make sure everything was okay. He was easy on the eye! Perfect vision he said. Just a bit dry and prescribed some drops. And they help sometimes, but not always. Try omega 3’s he said. And so I did. And again, they help sometimes, but not always. And he wondered what had changed in my life just before the tears started flowing. I was impressed with his question. Not bad for an optometrist. Pardon the pun. Quite insightful. What doesn’t change with the diagnosis of cancer?

And I’ve tried a bunch of complementary therapies to try to stop them weeping over the years. Therapies that have been so successful in other ways in my life, just don’t seem to help my eyes. But last week I noticed something quite strange.  Because it seems they water more when I’m feeling stressed. Maybe too much work. Not enough rest. And they seem to just stream. So I asked my husband. Why is this? And he said that when I’m under stress my nervous system doesn’t inhibit the tears as well.

And so I suddenly realised, these tears are my friends. Why fight them? They are the sign that I am working too hard and need to rest. They are my guide, my body’s way of reminding me to slow down and take care of me. And it reminded me of something I once heard said. That our stresses can be like gifts in funny wrapping paper…

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